I have a theory

September 13, 2012

I have a Reverse Samson theory about Zach McAllister’s hair. When we called him up last season, his hair was a bit shaggy and he played poorly (6.11 ERA in 17.2 innings pitched). This season, he’s sporting a slightly shorter haircut and had a 4.31 ERA going into tonight’s game (in 102 innings pitched). He pitched well on Thursday, going 6 innings with 6 strikeouts and giving up 2 runs (one earned). I have a theory that he’d do well to go to the barbershop with Justin Masterson.

I have a theory that Lou Marson’s bat is loaded with only a minimal number of hits each night. He got a hit his first time up, so when he came to bat with 2 outs and runners on the corners in the 4th inning, you could almost see that the bat was devoid of hits.

I have a theory that Brent Lillibridge is part honey badger.

I have a theory that Rangers pitcher Derek Holland is the love child of Adam Sandler and Bob Dylan.

I have a theory that the middle of tonight’s lineup is Manny Acta’s Big Right-Handed Hitter Dating Game. I kept referring to Vinny Rottino, Matt LaPorta, and Thomas Neal as Bachelor #1, Bachelor #2, and Bachelor #3. LaPorta went 3-4 with a two-run homer, making him the smooth guy who gets picked for the date.

I have a theory that it will take a long time before the Indians reach 3 million in attendance in a single season, as the Rangers did tonight.

I have a Pollyanna Theory that if you play every game like it matters and don’t give up, you can win a ball game, even if you  have to use half the guys on your active roster to do so.  The Indians used 3 pinch hitters, 1 pinch runner, and 5 pitchers, making it a little like a Little League game where everybody plays. The only difference is the Tribe was playing the team with the best record in the American League and still managed to pull out the win.

I have a theory that you can’t attach too much meaning to any individual win or loss, but I will attach the maximum amount of meaning and emotional gestalt possible to tonight’s win. We avoided a sweep, we hit three long balls, and we came from behind in the 9th, all of which are things this team has not been doing.

I have a theory that you can’t ask for much more from a baseball game than what Tribe fans got tonight.


  • Steve Alex says:

    Two home runs against Joe Nathan!? All right! The Tribe showed a lot of heart tonight.
    I’d like to see Diaz get a look at shortstop now if A-Cab is going to be out. Our utility guys can’t play short.

  • Susan Petrone says:

    Steve: Yeah, why not Diaz? At least give him a chance. The only upside to being as deep in the hole as the Indians are now is that they can afford to experiment. It’s like Spring Training in September.

  • Steve Alex says:

    Exactly. If the Indians decide to rebuild and trade Cabrera, they will need a stopgap SS until Lindor or Wolters is ready. Diaz is the best internal candidate that the team should be looking at. Starting utility players with no prospects for starting accomplishes nothing.

  • boog powell says:

    I have a theory that Luis Medina is still in the minors and will be recalled to save the season.

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